Yesterday was International Women’s Day and I’ve been thinking. There’s been a lot of talk about how women are marginalized and overlooked. And how they must be included and heard. That is all right and good. As for me, I don’t particularly worry myself with these things. I’ve come to the “comfortable” conclusion that it is a man’s world. And a woman’s worst enemy is many times another woman.
Think about all the times a woman has been in charge of something, has been a boss, has been influential, has had a voice. I have thought about it. And I remember that some of my worst work experiences have been in the hands of women. Oh, there are very bad men. I’m not excusing them. But I am asking you to turn and focus on the other side. As women, how much have we helped ourselves? When given the opportunity what chances have we given other women? What advantages? What help? What support?
So case in point: I’m watching a movie on a Kia Granbird Bus on the way back to Accra- OK, watching is putting it loosely because of course, I’m writing and listening to music as well. It is a long movie (it has four parts: “Odo Carpenter” part 1 and 2, and “Carpenter Love” part 1 and 2). Right now, two women are fighting each other instead of the man whose fault it really is. And to say that I am irritated is putting it mildly.
Women can be very mean to other women but does anyone talk about it on Women’s Day? If a male boss said you were fat and had to slim down to look smart, we would say it was sexist and go up in arms. But women bosses say it to their female employees all the time. If I were to have an open forum to allow women have their say, I’m sure we’d all have our horror stories of how we were badly treated by one of our own.
If women can genuinely like other women, it would make things easier. The mere fact that we don’t band together leaves a lot of room for men to frolic and step all over us. There is an almost unreal beauty and power leading to tremendous results when women come together to really fight for a cause. Case in point, another movie (this one quite hilarious) – “The Other Woman”. Movies are sometimes necessary when we need to say things we don’t always want to say outright.
March 8, 2017 was International Women’s Day. I was certainly treated well by a good man on that day. But until next year when we celebrate the next one, if you are a woman, all I’m saying is be kind to other women.